. : Service and Support

The place for 'daily hellos' and everything else you want to talk about...

Postby morton1 » 02.11.2011, 16:11

I recently had a argument with someone I know over having respect for others.an was told "if people want my respect they have to earn it ." I was just gobbed smacked to say the least, "an that goes for trust to" I was told. it played on mind all day. I was brought up to have respect for others an I brought up my children that way to.but it still plays on my mind. am thinking  is this person right? . is there any one eles who thinks respect an trust as to be earned. 
Avatar
morton1
 
Posts: 3378

Postby sheilaz » 02.11.2011, 16:37

Morton, I'm with you on this, although I too hear that argument put forward, and think it's a shame.
For me, if everyone offered trust and respect willing in the first instance, the world would be a happier place.
Then, if that trust is abused, it is dented or withdrawn, but I'd rather start from a respectful position.
Avatar
sheilaz
 
Posts: 53

Postby HawkeyeBill » 02.11.2011, 17:39

Hi,We tend to assume people 'in general ' are trustworthy and respectful but we all know that in relationships trust abused takes a long time to be restored.It is not possible to respect someone without knowing them,tolerance..yes and admiration..maybe It depends on your definition of the words.That's only my opinion;neither right nor wrong.god bless
Avatar
HawkeyeBill
 
Posts: 75

Postby wolfie13 » 02.11.2011, 18:55

well i can only speak from my own point of view, respect i have for almost everyone, especially the elder people than myself, as this is how i was brought up, I tend to lose respect for people who i know misuse their positions in life, ie bent police, teachers who abuse pupils, you get the general idea.. and trust goes along the same kind of lines with me, i trust almost everyone, (some may say im silly ) until the trust is broken, however that may be, then it takes time to trust that person,
this is just my personal view, i may be wrong, but as you say, who is to say right or wrong really?, all depends on personal circumstances yeah?
thanks and see ya
wolfie.
Avatar
wolfie13
 
Posts: 62

Postby Graham1 » 02.11.2011, 21:48

I agree wolfie in that we should respect everyone unless we have a good reason not to.
I'm with you too Morton as I dont believe anyone should have to earn respect; it should be a basic human right.
Avatar
Graham1
Administrator
 
Posts: 2467

Postby solitaire » 03.11.2011, 22:46

sheilaz wrote:Morton, I'm with you on this, although I too hear that argument put forward, and think it's a shame.
For me, if everyone offered trust and respect willing in the first instance, the world would be a happier place.
Then, if that trust is abused, it is dented or withdrawn, but I'd rather start from a respectful position.



Given how open-ended some words and concepts are, I'd much prefer to start from what I would term a 'civilized' position, in that every human being should be accorded a modicum of civility.
'Respect' in this case would properly be civility; as for going any deeper than our social veneer we must wear, that is a very private and personal measurement. as so with 'trust'. That word is a loaded term and again a concept that is very personal. Do we 'trust' strangers'? Trust them for what; to do what, exactly? Or should we put it in terms of the everyday marketplace of dealing with total strangers who may or may not be 'unstable'...
I'm very cautious and at times suspicious of people, especially totally strange people; just how 'strange' are they? In this day and age, a 'bit' of paranoia, could be what saves a life...Life Ahead: Proceed With Caution..(actually, I should say: Humans Ahead: Proceed With Extreme Caution. :lol:
Indiscretion is really, not the better part of valour...and always be civil!
(what was it that Oscar Wilde said...'Oh, I hate the cheap severity of abstract ethics.' :lol:
Avatar
solitaire
 

Postby sheilaz » 03.11.2011, 23:57

Well, that's good advice about keeping a degree of cynicism, and of course, real trust is built up when we know people, it's not a starting point at a deep level. This site is a good example of that, we start as strangers.

Civil is a better word, I try to be civil, but the point being, I agree with Morton that is a sad world if respect has to be earned?
Avatar
sheilaz
 
Posts: 53

Postby HawkeyeBill » 04.11.2011, 14:13

Answer this: 'Do you lock your doors? ' Why do we lock our doors...because we know that many people who are nice to your face would rob you given the chance.Respect is the same.It's in the definition.You don't leave your children with strangers.(You have to be honest with yourself before you can be honest with me).I don't agree with someone because it's politically correct.I don't treat people with 'disrespect' either;that's not my meaning.I am friendly with everyone (more than most people) but it is not possible to respect someone without knowing them...it is simply an impossibility.You can respect ,ie,a singer's talent but if you don't know them how can you say you respect them.
Avatar
HawkeyeBill
 
Posts: 75

Postby ThunderingDave » 04.11.2011, 18:51

I'm had experience as an instructor at a post-seconday school and found a lot of students respected me, and showed it in class, because of my age and expertise, that meant I showed respect to them for what they are doing. The interaction was marvelous. No respect then there was NO effort on my part to enrich them.
Avatar
ThunderingDave
 
Posts: 2

Postby morton1 » 04.11.2011, 23:30

HawkeyeBill wrote:Answer this: 'Do you lock your doors? ' Why do we lock our doors...because we know that many people who are nice to your face would rob you given the chance.Respect is the same.It's in the definition.You don't leave your children with strangers.(You have to be honest with yourself before you can be honest with me).I don't agree with someone because it's politically correct.I don't treat people with 'disrespect' either;that's not my meaning.I am friendly with everyone (more than most people) but it is not possible to respect someone without knowing them...it is simply an impossibility.You can respect ,ie,a singer's talent but if you don't know them how can you say you respect them.
 HI HawkeyeBill.do you have children?,even if you don't,would bring them up to have respect for others,example for there elders,or would you bring up telling them that people have to earn there respect.if parents did not teach there child about respect what kind of world would we be living in?. trust should be given,not earned.that,s why we call it trust.its what I believe an I do understand that people have there own opinion on respect an trust an I respect that. 
Avatar
morton1
 
Posts: 3378

Postby canadaalice » 07.11.2011, 1:33

I too believe that you should respect everyone...unless they have given you reason not to. I can't say I agree with the saying that you have to earn respect, though I do believe that to get respect, you have to give respect.
Avatar
canadaalice
 
Posts: 22

Postby mellowman27 » 29.01.2012, 20:44

Jesus repected and loved his disciples..................they betrayed, denied, and exposed him to the murdering Roman army...............mortals......are ........mortal.......forgiveness devine........
Avatar
mellowman27
 
Posts: 22


Return to The Lounge - Open Forum